Stones

Went to my GP's today (previous appointment was cancelled) for the results of the scan I had. As far as the high liver readings he seemed none the wiser so another blood test next week to see if the reading has changed. He did say I had some fatty deposits in my liver but that was pretty common and may but probably not the cause of the high reading. I do however have some gallstones. I asked if that may have been what caused the terrible pain I had (when ever it was) last year and he said it probably was. Of course at the time when I was in real pain the doctors I saw on each occasion putting it down to anxiety causing tense stomach and bowel muscles. Which basically boiled down to they did not believe how much pain I was in which is pretty normal when you have been tarred with the mental illness brush. If the stones dont cause any more or much problem then the GP said to just leave it alone.

I also saw my pdoc who put my Venlafaxine up to 150mg. Not that my GP seemed very happy about it with a subtle tut and roll of the eyes.

I am worried about my dad who has been really ill the last week or so. He has been having lots of tests which have either fine or still waiting for the results. He looks terrible and at times can hardly stand up he is so drained. Of course my mum keeps telling me how bad he is and how she things he has something really bad. I am worried enough as it is with out her listing every illness and disease known to man.

SI Comments

The other day I was at my parents and sister #2 was there as well and it was pretty warm. I tried to cope with it but I was just to hot and had to take my jacket off and so my arms were showing. My sister had already warned my mum about scars and not to say anything to me. I did catch my sister looking although I never said I had noticed. I did not see either of my parents look so fair play on that. However my sister did say both my mum and dad had said to her about it and were upset and shocked. Not that it stopped my mum from piling the pressure and stress on me though.

As for H I has a message on the answer phone (as I never picked up the call) asking to change the appointment time and to meet at my house. I was not keen on going anyway and meeting at mine probably meant another 'event' had been planned. I had no money anyway if we were going to get a bus again. Three quid the week before and even £2 for the bus and thats a fiver which is a lot of money to me. Anyway I was not keen on being caught again like last time so I did never called back and have avoided calls since. I know it a sucky, wimpy way of doing it and something I would be pissed about if the boot was on the other foot. Now I am in no mans land too embarrassed and anxious to call and too embarrassed not to call. Unfortunately the anxious wins.