Comments a re-examination

When I started this blog I spent a long time, probably too long, deciding what to do with comments. At the time I decided to allow comments but with moderation. I was concerned on many levels (as per usual) and some of those concerns are starting to gain some ground although I admit I am not overly sure if thats just in my mind or reality.

I have been fortunate that all of the comments have been good in one way or another and even raised a smile, so thank you for that. One of the problems is that I feel like I should comment back to other blogs and many times I do want to say something. Other times I am just feeling compelled to try and comment back. Either way spending anywhere from 30 to 60 minutes trying to work out what to say or how to say it is not helping me. The you get that tit for tat, are they replying to me because I replied to them? Do I reply to a reply? What if I dont comment or reply what are they going to think. What if I have more than one comment and respond to one will the others get upset I never responded to them? I bet they dont want to comment but they feel compelled to. On and on it goes.

Then there is the issue that I get easily upset and can take things the wrong way when I over analyse each word. Given that I fall out with everyone with in a short period of time and I dont want that to happen. I know part of me pushes people away that I like (classic defence mechanism) which is not always done in a nice way and the rest I end up hating. Again yes I know I do this because I constantly view and analyse my own actions. I lie awake at night deep in thought but that does not mean I can change it.

Anyway I have seen, thought, envisioned and run through a few scenarios after a couple of things internally and externally have sounded the alarm bells and left me scrambling for cover. I am a firm believer in that the past dictates the future. The route of like, find some issue, push away is a well trodden path. I am the epitome of the cliche 'damaged goods' and I have a record of bringing more misery to people whom I am in contact with. Like some sort of contagious carrier of a misery, despair and bad fortune plague.

So to avoid as many of these issues as possible I am going to turn of commenting and do my best to avoid commenting elsewhere for the good of all concerned.